Similarities Between Caring for Small Children and the Elderly

I have a 3-year old toddler and I can’t help but notice the similarities between taking care of a toddler and caring for an elderly parent.

Autonomy vs Safety

For both small children and the elderly, there’s a need to balance safety and autonomy. I can prevent my toddler from climbing the rock wall in the playground, but if I do, how would he learn to take calculated risks, and build the strength to do such things, and acquire the confidence when he successfully climbs it? In the same vein, we can tell our parents that they can’t live alone anymore because someone needs to make sure that they don’t slip and fall, or that they take their medications on time or that they eat nutritious meals. But taking away their autonomy can make them defensive or even contribute to the decline of their health. We need to think about how to strike a good balance between autonomy and safety. 

It Takes a Village

We’ve all heard the adage that “it takes a village to raise a child”. What I’ve observed is that we should say the same about taking care of our elderly. When this responsibility only falls on one primary caregiver, it takes a toll on that person’s physical and mental health. We have a responsibility to help care for our elderly and this can be in the form of volunteering at our local aging centers or dropping by to visit an elderly neighbor.

May Need to Hire a Caregiver

Every parent or parent-to-be knows that eventually they will have to hire a nanny or find a daycare for their child so they can go back to work. Most of them start looking for these resources before the baby is born. And yet, we are usually blindsided when the need arises to find a caregiver for our elderly loved ones. As a result, we struggle to know our options or to even know where to start looking. In addition, we are unprepared for the financial impact of elderly care. It’s important to consider the potential need to hire a caregiver, not just for our children but for our elderly loved ones.

Lack of Government Financial Support

Unfortunately, in the United States, we don’t get enough financial support from the government to fund the care of our children or our elderly. Florida, Oklahoma, Vermont, and the District of Columbia are the only states that enroll all 4-year-olds in free preschool programs. Several states offer some form of free pre-school, but programs may have limited entry, fewer days per week, or may not cover the full cost of tuition. And what about care for children ages 0 to 3? Government funding is just as limited for elderly care. Medicare and most health insurance plans don’t cover long-term care. As a result, caring for our children and our elderly can take a financial toll on individuals. 

There are many more similarities between caring for our children and our elderly but these are the ones that stand out to me the most. They’re also the ones that arguably require the most thought and consideration.

Let’s take care of each other.

Here’s my toddler enjoying a little bit of autonomy at Ikea.